Why kids do what they do

[misty]

I was reading something today that said:

Here are two phrases for parents to remember in understanding your children:

A child's behavior occurs because of who the child is, what the child knows about you, and what the child wants from you.

The child will do things either to get POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT, or to ESCAPE or AVOID SOMETHING that he does not want to do or have.

I never thought about it in those terms but HOW TRUE! My daughter KNOWS how to get what she wants from us. She KNOWS which parent to ask for what, how much whining it'll take to break us, etc.

The article said our kids NEED to know how to listen and obey parents and that we NEED to take the time to teach them. We are doing our kids a great disservice when we give in to them just because they whine or throw a tantrum.

Now, how do I get my husband to go along with this? He gives in to Shannon ALOT, even if I've already said no. I keep telling him just wait till shes a teenager, he'll be sorry he did that!

[Linda]

This sure hit home!! My 9 year old grandson just about puts me up the wall I really lost patience with him today when I asked him to do something for me!!

I know he is saying WHY WHY WHY just to annoy me! I finally said BECAUSE I AM THE ADULT AND YOU ARE THE KID!

[Charlie Girl]

I used to drive my mother up a wall with making her explain why for everything. I would happily comply if she told me why and it made sense to me, but dug in my heels if she wouldn't.

My son always asked why but it was more to keep the attention on him.

Like mother, not like son in this case.

[John]

I always asked why because I really wanted to know I guess . . .

PS ~ Dawn- can you tell Shannon that you are the SupremeCourt and Dad is Congress&President and has no power ?

[misty]

John, WHY did you really want to know?

[John]

[misty]

john said:

PS ~ Dawn- can you tell Shannon that you are the SupremeCourt and Dad is Congress&President and has no power ?

ROFLOL....I'll try that John....I'm not sure my husband will like that but its worth a shot!

[unicorn-tiff'smom]

These are so true. I see in Tiff that "just because" or "because mommy said so" aren't the answers she needs. She does need to know why all the time. And she isn't happy like Barb said until she fully understands.