Annoying Behavior and ADHD

[lillian]

When I was at the IDA conference, the doctor who discussed behavioral differences between LD and ADHD children said that repetitive, annoying behavior is a hallmark of ADHD. He said that children with ADHD will do things over and over, thinking that it's funny, when, in fact, it's annoying, and if seriously confronted on the behavior, the child will be hurt and upset, not understanding why the other person doesn't find it amusing. Oh, this is sooooo true of my son! If I could change one behavior of his, this is what I would change.

For example, I don't think my son brushed his teeth one time during the five days I was gone. His breath was wicked! I mentioned it before we went out to eat last night, and he said he would brush his teeth. When we got in the car, he leaned forward to talk to me, and I thought I was going to gag. I said something to him about it, and he laughed, then he started blowing on me. I asked him over and over to stop, and he wouldn't. He just kept laughing and doing it. I finally yelled at him--yes, I did--and he acted so wounded, but he stopped it.

Obviously, I don't want to have to yell at my son to get him to stop annoying me on purpose. What do all of you do to stop this behavior with your ADHD kids?

[misty]

OH MY! My daughter is the SAME way!

Yesterday she was on the computer & saw a big fish. She started dancing through the house chanting "Fish-mon, Fish-mon, Fishy fishy fish-mon" Over & over & over, laughing hysterically in between!

This is not unusual behavior for her. I've found that humor works best. In another thread I told of a time she was clucking like a chicken endlessly. My hubby & I came down the stairs clucking back at her & flapping our "wings". This cracked her up, but also stopped her!

With the fish-mon thing, I came in & chanted with her. She stopped....it just wasn't as much fun when MOM chanted I guess.

I admit, I do get so nerve wracked I resort to yelling "STOP THAT" on occasion, but it never fails to burst her bubble & turn her cheeriness into crabbiness. I'd much rather see her happy & bubbly. I've found that finding a way to make the behavior look silly to HER works best to stop it while salvaging her good mood (such as mom & dad being chickens, or mom chanting with her).

[Charlie Girl]

I go through the same thing with my son and it drives me batty.

I tend to yell and get crabby with him. I do try the humor when I think of it but unfortunately its become a habit to yell.

The humor does work so much better. We both have a laugh and the behavior stops faster.

[lillian]

Yes, I find humor always works the best with my son. He's a funny kid, too. He has a great sense of humor. When I'm tired, though, my humor seems to fade. This annoying behavior of his is my new thing to work on. I'm going to try anything and everything to stop his doing this and learning how to self monitor because he is not going to be able to have a roommate in college or a wife, if he doesn't stop doing this.

[katiekat]

My son does the same things and freely admits he does it "because it's fun". He loves to irritate and get a rise out of people. I have simply started giving him the "thumbs down" sign. It's less attention than yelling and for now it's working.

[notellin]

Oh yes, my son does this. He has done the breath thing to me also. I tell him to stop (in my stern unpleasant tone, sometimes very loud), and if he does not stop, I tell him that he is annoying and he can go in his room alone and do it there if he wants to continue. I've also told him that people find it annoying, they don't like that type of behavior, and people don't want to be with him when he does it (undiplomatic but this bluntness seems to work b/c he really does not get it). I've never gotten the hurt feelings response. Sometimes laughs and tells me that it's funny, really funny--that's when he gets sent to his room.

[katiekat]

Notellin my son never gets the hurt feelings either. Even when Im obviously angry with him he can barely contain his laughter.Irritating isnt it?

[misty]

katiekat said:

Even when Im obviously angry with him he can barely contain his laughter.Irritating isnt it?

OMG..I use that SAME tactic on my HUSBAND... He gets so MAD when he's ranting & I laugh at him. BUT its a button I know how to push, & push it I do. Its easier than arguing.

[notellin]

Oh yes katiekat, it is so annoying that one of us has to leave the room! Even when I say "no one thinks that is funny," he will say "but it is funny" and carry on...cracking himself up.

[jj]

My niece is obvious typical ADHD. I remember a trip we took to Minneapolis and my niece was bouncing off the car doors. It was her week or two weeks of being a horse (or maybe it was a cat) and thus whinning (or maybe meowing - can't remember)and flying around in the back seat all the way to Minneapolis. I so feel for you parents (and my sister) who have to deal with this day in and day out. I was so stressed by the time we got to the hotel I ended up taking a walk. No matter how many times my sister told her, ENOUGH, she just kept doing it and giggling. Yelling did not work.

My sister would love the answer to this question, how to get them to stop these annoying repetitive things.

[unicorn-tiff'smom]

Tiff has a friend that also had ADHD. She does things that are very annoying. Even other children are telling her that her behavior is annoying. She likes to make farting noises with her armpits. She can make herself burp for hours on end. Alot of her conversations have the words poopy, peeing, throw up or all of the above in them. And the other girls are not amused by it anymore. They tell her and it continues. She does it at scouts and I control it the best way I can.

[lostmyshoe]

Oh my gosh. I can identify with everyone here. Uni, my daugher has a friend with ADHD too and she went through a burping phase too. I think she's finally over it but she does act a little hyper sometimes when she comes over. She's gotten better as she's gotten older. I still have trouble with getting my daughter to brush her teeth, get to bed on time and get up on time. She also gets hung up sometimes on a goofy sound or word and will annoy me to death until she's tired of it. Sometimes I join her and other times I get aggravated. Sometimes I simply have to leave the room. Even this morning, as I write she does little things to drive me crazy. Right now she's quiet, so lets see if I can finish catching up with everyone before she starts again, LOL.

[bugsmom]

I can so relate to all of your stories. When Josh was younger he just loved to get a rise out of anyone by annoying them. He just thought it was a hoot. He really didn't realize how much he was bugging his friends until they stopped coming to the door to ask him to play. Finally, we came up with a code word that only him and I would know. If he was being annoying and I could tell his buddies were going to bolt, I would just say the word. One day it may have been "pickle" or "basketball", whatever, he would choose the word for the day and if I said it he would stop. Now, this would work with his friends, but of course, never with us. He just didn't care if it bothered us! Ha Ha. Anyway, he is so much better now that he is older, but every morning when its time to brush his teeth, he will go in the bathroom and make faces in the mirror until I have to yell at him to get moving. This is EVERY SINGLE MORNING! You would think after all these years it would stop, but no. Oh well, I guess it could be worst...its just sooooo annoying! By the way Katiekat...I love the thumbs up, thumbs down thing...I'm going to use that one...very simple and direct. Thanks for the tip!

[katiekat]

Hope it works for you Bugsmom! Sometimes I try and ignore things to see if he will stop but he never does. Just this morning he yelled "Im the winner" about 50 times befor I lost my mind.