For those who WORK for a school board..

[INaBOX]

I have a new K student starting monday who has high behaviours, ADHD, Sensory disorder, Cognitive/Language delayed. After reading the documents, he has a lot of characteristics that add up to Autism Spectrum Disorder .. however, I'm not a doctor.

The teacher I'll be working with isn't too keen on using any aides at this point (visual aides, sensory diets..) She primarily wants to deal with the behaviours but more so as providing her expectations and offering consequences for all those who don't comply. We have a similar belief system but I've spent the last 3 years working on preventative measures rather than just dishing out consequences for 'bad' behaviour.

We will be doing an IEP for this student but it's going to take time for it to be set. In the meantime, I'm feeling a little bit discouraged because I believe there's usually a message behind a behaviour .. and not always attention seeking. She's under the belief (along many other staff members who knows this mother) that it's due to her lack of parenting skills that this boy is out of control.

Any suggestions?

[Charlie Girl]

I wish I had some.

Its common to blame the parent for any neurological behavior.

Unfortunately, a teacher will have some success with consequences which only reinforces in her mind that all the child's problems are under his control. They don't see that a kid who sits there and misses most of recess, then suddenly does all his work in a matter of a couple of minutes so he can get out for the last little bit wasn't sitting there because he only wanted a 2 minute recess.

Inattention and inability to focus shift into hyperfocus and that is what the teacher latches onto, never realizing that couldn't became could, rather than won't became will, and of course its Mom's fault for not making her little darling learn self discipline at an early age.

[rae70]

I dont know this mother - but I was told by the principal of my school that it was my fault my son was like he was...

I was gobsmacked. I have 3 other children that are perfect at school. Perfect grades and behaviour.

I would have liked to hamstring him when he said that. He told me I need to work on my disciplining.