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Post by countrygirl on Jun 30, 2006 7:26:09 GMT -5
The other day I told Emily to go play with Molly, another 4 year old from our church. She told me, "Molly won't play with me. she doesn't like me." I told her sure Molly would play. Try again. go up to her and say, Molly let's play. So she did. I couldn't believe what I saw. Molly, told her she didn't want to play with her and turned her little nose up, turned around and left poor Emily standing there. It broke my heart. I just shrugged and waved my hand and said, then we'll find someone else to play with. She asked Molly's 2 year old brother and he said yes.
I felt like I set her up for failure. the look she gave me was so sad. she believed me and trusted me. I felt awful
I can't believe 4 year olds would behave that way, I thought she still had a couple of years anyway.
Maybe Molly thinks that Emily is younger. Molly is a very big 4 year old and Emily is a tiny 4 year old. Emily is closer to the size of Molly's 2 year old brother. I thought about letting Molly know that Emily was the same age and trying to play a game with them, but, I'm afraid I might be setting Emily up for failure again.
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Post by misty on Jun 30, 2006 9:34:36 GMT -5
Its so hard watching your kids/grandkids get rejected. I read recently that parents worry about that more than school success or anything else. But, Emily did play with the little boy. Did she seem to enjoy herself or was she still upset over the girl rejecting her? I ask because my daughter has always been happier playing with either boys or children younger than herself. They seem to like what she likes & boys aren't as "catty" as girls. Your idea of playing a game with the girls is a good one. If Emily wants to be friends with Molly but is unsure what to do, setting up a play date & interacting with them until they get started might help alot. When Shannon was smaller I would set up the sprinkler & invite the nieghborhood girls over to run through it with her. Even though they were coming for the sprinkler fun & not really because they liked Shannon, she did end up making a really good friend out of 2 of the girls. They are 12 now & all still friends. At 4, you can still set up play dates & play with the kids without them thinking they are too big to be playing with someones Mommy/Grandma. Take advantage of that to gently guide them. They are still learning how to make & be a friend. With your help they will both learn!
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Post by Charlie Girl on Jul 1, 2006 0:18:54 GMT -5
I did the same thing for my son. We got him a bike ramp and other toys that the neighborhood kids would like to play with. Once they were at our house, playing with our son, I would watch and try to steer my son into appropriate behavior. We would talk about things that had happened and how he could have handled them differently, etc. It make a huge difference.
Remember too, Molly may have problems or issues you don't know about. Did she play with other kids and ignore Emily? If not, there may be a reason for her aloofness other than that she is a 4 yr old snob.
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Post by countrygirl on Jul 1, 2006 7:42:56 GMT -5
Thanks for the advice. (dd) Kimi had problems with making friends when she was little as well. She was soooo bossy that no one wanted to play with her. Come to think of it Miss Emily is bossy too. hummm - Molly plays with another little girl named Kaylee. They are both very big for their age and I have to wonder if their size has something to do with it. Molly's parents are both 6 foot tall. Emily is so tiny. She can still wear 24mo. shorts. She only weighs 30 pounds. Her little sister is bigger. Not taller, but bigger.
I think I will talk to Kimi about inviting Molly to their house for a playdate. Most kids love playing on the farm here, but, Kimi, has a farm, a trampolene, a swingset, a swimming pool and horses to ride. (My grandbabies are so underprivledged LOL)
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